Archive | November, 2013
26 Nov

I never thought i would be one of those people that just had to blog from their phone but here it is.
Im angry because currently i am apart of my family’s insurance plan and it took them till the end of November to realize our plan is being canceled January first.
My mom blames it on obama but honestly our plan was shit.
There is zero mental health benefits and it doesn’t do anything for normal Dr visits….so theyve been paying a ridiculous amount for insurance that doesn’t help out at the end of the day.
So what is my family’s plan for dealing with this? Ugh well lets not have insurance of course!
Great just great….
Then i don’t have funding in place for the winter semester of university. My usual cosigner told me a few days ago that she can not right now.So currently my dad has plans for what will happen and Im not too optimistic for them because on the phone he told me maybe just quitting is a valid option AND that he cant help me out forever. Hmmm…what else…my family doesn’t get that grad school is in my future and they think its unnecessary but my bachelors degree will mean next to nothing without grad school.
So thanksgiving is going to bring alot of stress and family discussions about my future.
On the psychology medication front i really should have not started down this path i owe hundreds of dollars to my psychologist and my last medication gave me a rash and made me sick. So Im trying what is only my #3 or #4 of antidepressants.
And my anxiety somehow has gotten worse. And my depression has gotten worse and and suicide seems like a pretty good option and even if i wasnt stressed it still would…
So yeah thats me and my life



14 Nov

I get angered by dumb things. recently my kick has been being referred to as a, “life partner.” Its OK for other people to like that terminology and own it but for me it’s just the official way to say another favorite phrase of mine, “special friend.” 

No I am not my girlfriend’s “life partner” no I am not her “special friend” believe it or not but were together. I wouldn’t do half the things that I have with just a friend and I would not plan a future with her if she was just my friend. 

This past weekend was extremely awkward because there was a family thing and my extended family/ grandparents can’t know that I am gay, yet I’m allowed to bring my girlfriend….so it was basically like, “uhh this is, you know….(insert gfs name)” or my younger brother would introduce her to people. And then my dad’s family was asking if I was seeing anyone new

on the positive (yay!) I found out via my girlfriend that my dad is more accepting than I thought whilst my mom is a work in progress.